Hi Kathy! Welcome to Biblical Families. The ladies chat is tomorrow night, I'd like to encourage you to join in, it's a great place to meet other women from this website, those that are in plural marriages and those that aren't.
I am an only wife right now, so I don't have the experience that can give you the correct counsel, but I would like to say that you are not at all the first woman who has struggled with this! There are many women who have been in your exact place and it does get easier. The only advice I can give to you, and it is the most important thing, is to draw close to YHWH. It is He who will guide you and give you the wisdom, peace, and knowledge that you need.