About two months ago God asked me to study submission. As I studied I kept finding complimentarian sites and it just was missing something. So, one day in my gym I sat on the floor between sets and asked God to teach me about the mystery of marriage, submission, and the Bride of Christ. Almost instantly “biblical gender roles” flashed through my mind. I found a site with those words as a website. As I read and listened I came across how learning about polygny can help your monogamous marriage. I was stunned! This was a Christian site?!!! But as I listened- it did!
I didn’t want to tell my husband because I was fearful of what door that could open, but the Holy Spirit pressed upon my heart to not fear and tell him, so I did. He was stunned. But, as we searched the scriptures it became more and more apparent that polygny was a biblical marriage choice, so I looked up “biblical marriage” and eventually found “biblical families.” I read for days. I started sharing with my husband what I was reading. He decided we needed to buy some books and do a deep dive, so we have six and are reading them together each day and talking about it. He wants to study, prepare, plan, and be available for whatever God decides. He doesn’t want another wife, but He wants God’s will more than anything. I do as well.
God began placing me under His heavy hand. I literally felt on fire every single day for two weeks! Some days I still do. One night His Spirit came upon me with fear and trembling and Holy reverence overcame me. All I can say is I fear God now in a way I have never known before and it was much needed and I am grateful.
He began exposing the feminism in my life and ripping it out and teaching me His way. He showed me that I was actually anti-patriarchy. I repented and renounced of my participation in feminism- patriarchy’s adversary. I cannot believe how deeply rooted it is.
He has also been training me to emotionally regulate better. The realization that jealousy is masculine, not feminine has completely changed how I think. I don’t want to worship the god of feminism. I made my husband get a vasectomy after our 4th child. I knew it was not God’s will, but children were overwhelming me and I couldn’t cope. God told me to repent for this two weeks ago, so I did, and He asked me to ask my husband to forgive me and to consider a reversal. He has and is looking into it. This demand was worship to feminism.
. I’m so overwhelmed by my past disobedience and lack of understanding, but grateful He is renewing my mind and carrying me out of Babylon! 
We are actively praying that God sends a wife in His timing if it’s His will. He has no unction to pursue. We are praying for her. My husband has felt very different since learning all of this- like a mantle of authority was placed upon him. The day after he experienced that I prayed that. When I told him I prayed for that he told me it already happened. Our relationship dynamic is so much more peaceful now. It was already so very good, but me understanding and choosing submission has been empowering for us both.
I have loved this incredible man for 40 years and two weeks ago discovered he is not “mine.” This has been very difficult to grasp, but I am leaning in. He is available.
God comforted me with 4examples: Abraham and Isaac, Mary at the angel’s news, The rich young ruler, and Jesus in the garden. God asked Abraham to give up his son, Mary her reputation, the rich man his wealth, and Jesus His life. Then He asked me if I trusted Him. I think so…?! My greatest treasure in this life is my amazing man of valor husband. God is asking me if I will share him. I realize it’s not my choice. My spirit says, yes, absolutely, God’s will be done! My flesh writhes and cries out in excruciating agony- noooooooooo!!!!
My husband waits to hear from the Father and is watching for what He is doing. If I am asked to do this, I am determined to be the best first wife I can be. God help me!
I didn’t want to tell my husband because I was fearful of what door that could open, but the Holy Spirit pressed upon my heart to not fear and tell him, so I did. He was stunned. But, as we searched the scriptures it became more and more apparent that polygny was a biblical marriage choice, so I looked up “biblical marriage” and eventually found “biblical families.” I read for days. I started sharing with my husband what I was reading. He decided we needed to buy some books and do a deep dive, so we have six and are reading them together each day and talking about it. He wants to study, prepare, plan, and be available for whatever God decides. He doesn’t want another wife, but He wants God’s will more than anything. I do as well.
God began placing me under His heavy hand. I literally felt on fire every single day for two weeks! Some days I still do. One night His Spirit came upon me with fear and trembling and Holy reverence overcame me. All I can say is I fear God now in a way I have never known before and it was much needed and I am grateful.
He began exposing the feminism in my life and ripping it out and teaching me His way. He showed me that I was actually anti-patriarchy. I repented and renounced of my participation in feminism- patriarchy’s adversary. I cannot believe how deeply rooted it is.
He has also been training me to emotionally regulate better. The realization that jealousy is masculine, not feminine has completely changed how I think. I don’t want to worship the god of feminism. I made my husband get a vasectomy after our 4th child. I knew it was not God’s will, but children were overwhelming me and I couldn’t cope. God told me to repent for this two weeks ago, so I did, and He asked me to ask my husband to forgive me and to consider a reversal. He has and is looking into it. This demand was worship to feminism.
. I’m so overwhelmed by my past disobedience and lack of understanding, but grateful He is renewing my mind and carrying me out of Babylon! We are actively praying that God sends a wife in His timing if it’s His will. He has no unction to pursue. We are praying for her. My husband has felt very different since learning all of this- like a mantle of authority was placed upon him. The day after he experienced that I prayed that. When I told him I prayed for that he told me it already happened. Our relationship dynamic is so much more peaceful now. It was already so very good, but me understanding and choosing submission has been empowering for us both.
I have loved this incredible man for 40 years and two weeks ago discovered he is not “mine.” This has been very difficult to grasp, but I am leaning in. He is available.
God comforted me with 4examples: Abraham and Isaac, Mary at the angel’s news, The rich young ruler, and Jesus in the garden. God asked Abraham to give up his son, Mary her reputation, the rich man his wealth, and Jesus His life. Then He asked me if I trusted Him. I think so…?! My greatest treasure in this life is my amazing man of valor husband. God is asking me if I will share him. I realize it’s not my choice. My spirit says, yes, absolutely, God’s will be done! My flesh writhes and cries out in excruciating agony- noooooooooo!!!!
My husband waits to hear from the Father and is watching for what He is doing. If I am asked to do this, I am determined to be the best first wife I can be. God help me!
Please keep us posted on how things develop as I'm sure many will be interested and encouraged by what you share. May Almighty God continue to providentially lead you into His perfect will. 