Hello! I have been on the sidelines here for the past 4 years or so and have gotten a wealth of knowledge and advice as my family has gone through changes due to our study and belief change in regards to polygyny. We have discussed our beliefs with our families and the reactions were understandable but difficult to handle to say the least. My wife and I have grown so much in our relationship with Christ as well as in our marriage to each other as a result. I am blessed to have found this group of people and look forward to taking part in future conversation and hopefully will be able to attend a gathering sometime soon!
The Story...
Hello all, I am just writing this as a deeper introduction than the quick one I posted before in the introduction section. I am sorry if it gets long winded. It is hard for me to stop when I get started haha
I want to start off by stating that my parents were and still are very much devoted to our Saviour and I am grateful for them taking the time and having the patience to give me a strong platform to build my faith on. I was always taught the importance of scripture and God's word. My wife was likewise raised in a Christian home and had two loving parents who instructed her in the way of the Lord to the best of their knowledge. They really set her up to follow the Bible and to take it seriously. They taught her the importance of serving her husband and respecting him as her head under God. My wife and I were both homeschooled. My family was in the market for goats to add to our little hobby farm and we ended up finding her family in a local homeshool directory. Long story short, we ended up getting along really well with them and I got engaged to her one month after we began dating, and married a year later after completion of my out of state schooling. We now have 5 wonderful children and one on the way!
Our walk into the polygyny belief started while we were doing Biblical research on adultery and lust. What we were taught wasn't holding up to what we were reading in scripture. This then led to us researching the definition of marriage and once again we were confused as it seemed that the never changing God somehow "allowed" or "put up with" polygamy being practiced in the old testiment. It didnt make sense, I would not follow a God that has a double standard and who allowed sin. James 1 says that God does not change like shifting shadows. He is a perfect God and never allows evil. This along with other truths resulted in both my wife and I believing that polygyny was never condemned by God but was actually encouraged or commanded in some situations. This was very hard to get used to as monogamy was so ingrained into my concience, even though the truth seemed obvious. My wife took it very hard at first understandably as she was raised with the "princess" mentality and could never imagine sharing me with anyone. Eventually she began to come around to see the benefits and how it could work. During this period of time we found biblical families and my wife began attending womens chat and we would read much from the forums. We also found the youtube series by Brian Kelson which really helped us better organize our beliefs. We would have been married nearly 5 years at this point and all this did is deepen our relationship and solidify our love for eachother. It was difficult but we pulled closer instead of apart. I really began to develop an interest in searching for a second wife and now had my wife's full support. Some months later we decided to birth one of our babies at home and one of my wife's sisters attended us. At one point she asked to use the computer and due to my lack of caution see noticed sisterwives.com in the search recommendations. Oops! This eventually led to her family finding out and then talking to my parents and siblings. This as you can probably imagine was not the way we planned on letting it out. It did not go well in any way. I had many discussions with my brothers and some with my parents. I got one email from my wife's father and we recieved much criticism and dislike. Eventually, my wife's family completely cut communication off from us. My family and us didn't really communicate for a few months but then began having some debate and trying to explain why we believe what we do. Slowly we were able to restore fellowship with my family though they disagree and I don't know how sure the relationship would be post second wife. My wife's family remained in a no contact state until just a few months ago when they asked if they could stop in. We invited them in gladly and it went surprisingly well. They have shown interest in wanting to work things out and I am hoping by the grace of God this will happen.
I having a strong interest in finding a second, have been searching on some of the dating sites with little results. I was in one relationship with a woman for about 6 months. Everything was looking very promising and I had worked out with her to fly to her state for a meeting and a couple days of talking and getting to know eachother better. This is when God stepped in and another couple that we met here and were talking with(name I cannot give for privacy of the other couple) said they were in a relationship with a woman from the same place and the same background. This led to finding out that she was in a relationship with both of us and the uncovering of many lies on her part to both of us. This needless to say was now a closed door. It was a mix of emotions since we became very close and were calling eachother regularly. I just praise my God for saving any further pain and complications. Since then we have only had few interactions which have never led to anything serious. Right now we continue to grow our wonderful family and are striving to further deepen our relationship with Christ. It is very hard to have patience sometimes when you have a desire for a second but if I never meet number 2 I will still be ever thankful for my Lord's work in our lives and the trials that He has led us through. They have only led to a better understanding of His word and eachother. Praise His holy name!
The Story...
Hello all, I am just writing this as a deeper introduction than the quick one I posted before in the introduction section. I am sorry if it gets long winded. It is hard for me to stop when I get started haha
I want to start off by stating that my parents were and still are very much devoted to our Saviour and I am grateful for them taking the time and having the patience to give me a strong platform to build my faith on. I was always taught the importance of scripture and God's word. My wife was likewise raised in a Christian home and had two loving parents who instructed her in the way of the Lord to the best of their knowledge. They really set her up to follow the Bible and to take it seriously. They taught her the importance of serving her husband and respecting him as her head under God. My wife and I were both homeschooled. My family was in the market for goats to add to our little hobby farm and we ended up finding her family in a local homeshool directory. Long story short, we ended up getting along really well with them and I got engaged to her one month after we began dating, and married a year later after completion of my out of state schooling. We now have 5 wonderful children and one on the way!
Our walk into the polygyny belief started while we were doing Biblical research on adultery and lust. What we were taught wasn't holding up to what we were reading in scripture. This then led to us researching the definition of marriage and once again we were confused as it seemed that the never changing God somehow "allowed" or "put up with" polygamy being practiced in the old testiment. It didnt make sense, I would not follow a God that has a double standard and who allowed sin. James 1 says that God does not change like shifting shadows. He is a perfect God and never allows evil. This along with other truths resulted in both my wife and I believing that polygyny was never condemned by God but was actually encouraged or commanded in some situations. This was very hard to get used to as monogamy was so ingrained into my concience, even though the truth seemed obvious. My wife took it very hard at first understandably as she was raised with the "princess" mentality and could never imagine sharing me with anyone. Eventually she began to come around to see the benefits and how it could work. During this period of time we found biblical families and my wife began attending womens chat and we would read much from the forums. We also found the youtube series by Brian Kelson which really helped us better organize our beliefs. We would have been married nearly 5 years at this point and all this did is deepen our relationship and solidify our love for eachother. It was difficult but we pulled closer instead of apart. I really began to develop an interest in searching for a second wife and now had my wife's full support. Some months later we decided to birth one of our babies at home and one of my wife's sisters attended us. At one point she asked to use the computer and due to my lack of caution see noticed sisterwives.com in the search recommendations. Oops! This eventually led to her family finding out and then talking to my parents and siblings. This as you can probably imagine was not the way we planned on letting it out. It did not go well in any way. I had many discussions with my brothers and some with my parents. I got one email from my wife's father and we recieved much criticism and dislike. Eventually, my wife's family completely cut communication off from us. My family and us didn't really communicate for a few months but then began having some debate and trying to explain why we believe what we do. Slowly we were able to restore fellowship with my family though they disagree and I don't know how sure the relationship would be post second wife. My wife's family remained in a no contact state until just a few months ago when they asked if they could stop in. We invited them in gladly and it went surprisingly well. They have shown interest in wanting to work things out and I am hoping by the grace of God this will happen.
I having a strong interest in finding a second, have been searching on some of the dating sites with little results. I was in one relationship with a woman for about 6 months. Everything was looking very promising and I had worked out with her to fly to her state for a meeting and a couple days of talking and getting to know eachother better. This is when God stepped in and another couple that we met here and were talking with(name I cannot give for privacy of the other couple) said they were in a relationship with a woman from the same place and the same background. This led to finding out that she was in a relationship with both of us and the uncovering of many lies on her part to both of us. This needless to say was now a closed door. It was a mix of emotions since we became very close and were calling eachother regularly. I just praise my God for saving any further pain and complications. Since then we have only had few interactions which have never led to anything serious. Right now we continue to grow our wonderful family and are striving to further deepen our relationship with Christ. It is very hard to have patience sometimes when you have a desire for a second but if I never meet number 2 I will still be ever thankful for my Lord's work in our lives and the trials that He has led us through. They have only led to a better understanding of His word and eachother. Praise His holy name!
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