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Support How am I supposed to act?

Hisdaughter

Hisdaughter

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Shalom. I am 50. I was married to the most wonderful husband ever! He was kind and patient and loving. Last November Yah called Jodi by name. He went home. Now I don't know how I am supposed to act or feel. I don't feel like a widow. I guess I don't really know what that is supposed to look like. Thank you in advance for your condolences. Everyone tells me how sorry they are and I do appreciate the support. I would like to be clear that my husband was very sick. He had instage renal failure. He was type 1 diabetic and had had a stroke. He couldn't speak or walk. I miss him every day but when I think about the fact that he doesn't have any more pain. He has no more sickness and no more disease. I am so secure in the knowledge that he is at peace. I guess my question is how do I move on with the rest of my life? I loved being married. I also beleive that every woman needs a covering. I feel out of sync with everything. How long is appropriate to mourn? What do I do without a covering? I will follow where Yah leads me. No matter what, I believe obedience to Yah is my first priority. Advice is welcome. WI would love to hear yalls thoughts. Bless y'all!
 
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Hisdaughter said:
How long is appropriate to mourn?
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There is no length of time, it's different for everybody. And you will never truly get past mourning, it will just look different. Certain memories won't hit as hard, you won't cry at particular events etc. My mother died over 25 years ago, and while I mostly live my days without even thinking about it, every now and then something happens and I remember and it hurts all over again, and I end up in tears.
Give yourself the grace to feel it all, to mourn as long as you need to.
 
Just a refrence to mourning in the Bible.. In Duetoronomy 34:8 Moses was mourned for 30 days as well as Duetoronomy 21:10-13 a woman captive mourned her father and mother for a full month. But that's just the time that I see they took for mourning in the Bible not saying that you gotta marry on the 30th day or anything.. With that said I couldn't actually imagine losing my husband and just moving on.. I guess I would just have to be in the situation to know how I'd react and what I'd do. It would definitely be weird to be without a husband as a covering tho. I'm sure you're in prayer about it all, I'll be praying for you too. If it's God's will I'm sure He will bring you the perfect husband.
 
I feel like I am ready to move on because I really loved being married. I worry though if because I love my husband and feel I always will would that be unfair to a future husband?
 
Hisdaughter said:
I feel like I am ready to move on because I really loved being married. I worry though if because I love my husband and feel I always will would that be unfair to a future husband?
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It is perfectly fine to want to be loved and to have someone in your life. And as FH2 said...

FollowingHim2 said:
There is no length of time, it's different for everybody.
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So if you feel you are ready to start a new chapter in life then you are ready. Just be careful is what I would advise because you carry with you years of love that will not simply fade from your heart. You can't remove the love you have for your husband but if you can make room for more love then that's up to you.

Regardless, you are in my prayers for healing and guidance. :)
 
First off, I am sorry for your loss- but also rejoice with you in knowing you will see him again!

Your heart is beautiful and I’m sure he felt like such a blessed man with you by his side.

No one but you will know when you are ready to find love again, but from what you have written, it seems as though you value the security, coving and blessings of a marriage and might be ready to open your heart to another. That doesn’t diminish the love you still have for him.

No man will ever replace your late husband. If/ when you find love, it will be different. He should be understanding that your love will never die for your late husband, but instead see the beauty in the happy relationship you were blessed with prior. I bet your late husband would be hoping you find someone that will cover you, love you and care for you like he would if he were still here.

Praying God give you peace, wisdom and clarity as you move forward in life.
 
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