It can be hard.

[Debra]

DH and I strongly consider ourselves polygamists, but no second wife. We have been waiting, wondering if it will ever happen. Sometimes we would like to just make it happen, but we know that we cannot. It is hard to just sit and wait. It seems hopeless at times. It is funny, because I want the sister wife relationship so bad! At times I wonder if it would be the way I see it in my mind, or will it be totally different?
We have actually been in the place a few times where we thought, maybe this is the one, but when the subject is brought up there is no interest what so ever on the other side. You hear about thousands and thousands of families out there in the US being polygamist families, and then you wonder how can it be so hard to find a second wife!! Just rambling here ladies....

 

[Nikismom]

It is hard! We have been hurt twice by the same woman! Hubby felt God telling him to give her another chance and we finally had her move into our home and after 3 months she moved out saying it wasn't us but she just had something she needed to take care of.

Sooooo to make a long story short... She moved out ending a 26 year friendship and a 2 year courtship.

Hubby and I are now just waiting for God to show us who, when and how! lol

Good luck!

 

[sweetthing26]

Yes it can be hard. I speak from the perspective of a Second Wife. It took three years of seeking to find the family that was meant for me. I went through several strings of talking and building friendships with some that I thought may end up being my family. Also, there were times when I thought that some were crazy because it seemed like they were only looking for a second wife to have children for them and some even asked me to have children and sign legal custody over to him and his first wife. With such madness out there I am sure you can see how single women looking to be second's or thirds etc. could get a little disheartened as well as scared off. I am not writing this to upset anyone but to give the perspective of how the second might have been a little jaded before so it is a thing of cautiousness and slowness and letting God place it all the way He desires it to be.
Liz

 

[Tali]

Oy vey, Lizzy!!

What you have been through, girl! :shock:

I have concluded that the seemingly disproportionate level of madness all about is because the enemy is trying to make believers in plural marriage appear to be as completely whacked as possible.

Thanks be to our Abba that He has done such a lovely job of "placing the solitary in families" when it comes to you and your new situation.

May YHWH Shalom continue to be your portion, and may Yeshua continue to shepherd your darling heart.

Ali

 

[sweetthing26]

Yes Ali,

Yeshua certainly has done some amazing things thus far. As I have said we did not have a long courtship but I do affirm that it was the hand of Yeshua moving in our lives.
Yeshua I know will bring healing in His time and it is I that have to hold on to Him and let HaShem work in only the way that He can.

Liz

 

[nicola]

Have you thought about praying for a wife? (I think I will start a topic with just that question)

 

[jasmine]

I feel for you!!! Im only just starting out in this new lifestyle and already I'm daunted!!! I don't think it would matter where I come in the man's life, but its all difficult. I mean, to find a man who's even open to having more than one wife in a Christian perspective, for me, is a mess. I can just picture what would happen if I told one that I want sister wives lol And then to find a family already established, because as said above some are just weird people...and of course, if they're decent people, they want to find the right new addition to their home. And, I would imagine, you and the man have to hit it off....in some ways it seems a bit tougher than just dating one man, because his whole family comes with it. But then again, you might get a better deal out of it too....???

 

[Joleneakamama]

I have to agree and empathise with all the posters here. As someone who never did much dating, (hubby didn't either) the very idea of trying to find someone you could share a life with is bad enough. When you add that she must be willing to at least contemplate being a second wife? Well, at that thought I'm ready to just give up.
While I very much enjoy the friends I have made on line, this whole trying to meet or even befriend people over the net definately has it's challenges!!!
I just keep telling myself it's in God's hands, and of course most people aren't going to be looking for a family like ours....but someone might be.
There is some comfort in knowing that even the singles deal with challenges or people that don't seem legit. (I guess it isn't just me)

in some ways it seems a bit tougher than just dating one man, because his whole family comes with it. But then again, you might get a better deal out of it too....???

I think this really touches the heart of it for me. I truly hope that someone, someday, thinks of me as an asset (besides my dear husband and family). I guess since I think of a sisterwife in that kind of positive light, I might find someone else someday that feels the same.
Thanks for sharing.

 

[laceylee]

Whether you are a single woman looking for your family, a husband looking for an additional wife, or a wife looking for that sisterwife friendship it is indeed very hard. I laid in bed last night and told my husband that the Lord will send someone to him (and us) when He feels it is the right time. Don't stress the search...just relax and your time will come. I can agree with all of you that have posted. It is hard, frustrating, and lonely when you want something so badly and no one seems to be the right "fit" and yes, there are families out there who try to take advantage of single women so please be careful. We also have had a "failed" poly relationship and it is hard when that person leaves your life, but always look ahead. Blessings will come!