irishprincess09
New Member
I have a question for the first wives....does anyone ever miss their "mono days"? What have you found helps you to get over this feeling of loss for that one on one relationship that you and hubby used to have?
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mourning monogamy
- Thread starter irishprincess09
- Start date
IP,
I am not in a plural situation yet, and I hope you don't mind me jumping in, here. I don't presume to know what you are going through, but I do know there are some general things that help with mourning. The first is that it is a blessed state, a situation that is designed to draw you closer to your Beloved, and a state for which there is a unique outpouring of comfort; that is a promise from God's Word! You have to pour your heart out to your Savior, in all honesty, and give Him permission to work in and through your discomfort in order to build the Kingdom within you from a whole new direction.
Think of the things that have brought mourning before, and the times of great change as well as disappointment, and how you got through those.This isn't going to be that much different, because mourning is mourning, and God is God.
We miss getting to sleep either late or at all, in some cases, after having had children, we would find it a great challenge to have a parent with Alzheimer's move in with us. If our husbands were deployed, we would miss their presence, if we had a disabled child, we would prepare for the fact that that child would never leave home and would always need us.
All of these situations have their own unique brand of "tough," but because of our choices, we will end up getting a new perspective and a new heart, or we'll get consumed with "I-itis."
I would make those "stolen moments" with your hubby extra special, without attaching an agenda or an expectation. In other words, just go love on your man with a free heart, and trust God to meet your needs, to amplify the effect of the alone time you do end up getting, and enjoy him for himself.
You are a brave girl!!
I am not in a plural situation yet, and I hope you don't mind me jumping in, here. I don't presume to know what you are going through, but I do know there are some general things that help with mourning. The first is that it is a blessed state, a situation that is designed to draw you closer to your Beloved, and a state for which there is a unique outpouring of comfort; that is a promise from God's Word! You have to pour your heart out to your Savior, in all honesty, and give Him permission to work in and through your discomfort in order to build the Kingdom within you from a whole new direction.
Think of the things that have brought mourning before, and the times of great change as well as disappointment, and how you got through those.This isn't going to be that much different, because mourning is mourning, and God is God.
We miss getting to sleep either late or at all, in some cases, after having had children, we would find it a great challenge to have a parent with Alzheimer's move in with us. If our husbands were deployed, we would miss their presence, if we had a disabled child, we would prepare for the fact that that child would never leave home and would always need us.
All of these situations have their own unique brand of "tough," but because of our choices, we will end up getting a new perspective and a new heart, or we'll get consumed with "I-itis."
I would make those "stolen moments" with your hubby extra special, without attaching an agenda or an expectation. In other words, just go love on your man with a free heart, and trust God to meet your needs, to amplify the effect of the alone time you do end up getting, and enjoy him for himself.
You are a brave girl!!
irishprincess09
New Member
Once again Ali, you seem to know just what to say. 
You are so right. Thank you for sharing. I love your wisdom and insight. <3
You are so right. Thank you for sharing. I love your wisdom and insight. <3