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Struggling with this

AlexaH

Member
Female
Hi Ladies,
So today I learned my husband doesn't celebrate Christmas in any way, shape or form. I'm struggling with this a bit as for me it's a huge part of my faith. Is there a way to ask him why he doesn't celebrate that doesn't make me seem like an ungrateful wife?
Alexa
 
Is this new for him? Did he celebrate last Christmas?
This seems like something you would discuss before getting married. If this isn't a brand new thing for him, then you both need to have a huge talk about communication and make sure you're both on the same page with everything and there aren't any other major surprises coming up, for both sides.

We don't really celebrate Christmas here, and there are others on this forum who choose not to as well. It's not really a Christian celebration, it's certainly not in the bible, and there are many pagan aspects to it.
It does feel like a huge loss when you stop celebrating it, but you can use the biblical feasts instead to have fun and meaningful celebrations.
 
Is this new for him? Did he celebrate last Christmas?
This seems like something you would discuss before getting married. If this isn't a brand new thing for him, then you both need to have a huge talk about communication and make sure you're both on the same page with everything and there aren't any other major surprises coming up, for both sides.

We don't really celebrate Christmas here, and there are others on this forum who choose not to as well. It's not really a Christian celebration, it's certainly not in the bible, and there are many pagan aspects to it.
It does feel like a huge loss when you stop celebrating it, but you can use the biblical feasts instead to have fun and meaningful celebrations.
From my understanding He has never done Christmas. Personally, I have always had Christmas and Hanukkah. I know when we were discussing Passover he talks about it not being needed anymore because of Christ. Which Biblical Feasts are you speaking of?
Alexa
 
There's a bunch of biblical feasts that many of us observe. Passover is one of them, as well as the feast of tabernacles, the day of atonement, feast of trumpets etc.
So, your husband doesn't do Christmas and doesn't do the feasts. Does he do Easter? What are his beliefs?
I repeat my comment about you two having a good talk about this. It doesn't make you ungrateful to want to communicate and have a clear outline of what he does and why. Communication is the KEY to a successful marriage, plural or otherwise.
 
My family celebrated holidays, so of course I would too when I had my own family, this was my assumption. After years of marriage, we began to study for ourselves what each holiday’s origins came from. It was a very hard thing to discontinue a tradition, but knowing why helped. Christmas was the most emotional to not take part in the way we had in years past.
I agree with @FollowingHim2, having a conversation with your husband and getting to know the why of his decision will help. It’ll also let you understand more of your husband’s heart.
I’m surprised you’re just now knowing this. But, I do get the concept of something being important to me will likely be to him. It’s a bit starting when it’s not important and now what??? As Google Map’s idiot lady says ‘recalculating’.... adjustments ahead, it might be a bumpy ride.
 
Definitely a good thing to discuss before marriage or whenever it comes up.
There is a thread on here "Jennie"s list of questions" with that question as well as a bunch more that a lady might want to know the answers to before saying "I will" ("I do" really means nothing..... if it can change tomorrow!)

I grew up with regular holidays minus halloween, and my mom did them in very personal ways with lots of little traditional add ons too.
The year we married we studied the origin of christmas and decided we didn't want to participate. I can't say I've missed it, and I am very glad our children don't have all the warm fuzzy memories tied up with it.
It is a bunch of commercialized idolatry in my opinion. Though many have helped others in the christmas season inspired by Christ and because of the association of him with that day, you can keep the spirit of "goodwill toward men" and scrap the rest. We are living proof.
 
From my understanding He has never done Christmas. Personally, I have always had Christmas and Hanukkah. I know when we were discussing Passover he talks about it not being needed anymore because of Christ. Which Biblical Feasts are you speaking of?
Alexa
Hi Alexa,
If you go to Leviticus in the Torah (Genesis through Deuteronomy) you find them outlined and described. Without making this a long post, many Christians call these Jewish Holy Days, but the truth is they are God's appointments with His people, Jewish or not. Many say they don't apply to followers of Jesus, but the fact is they are all prophetic pictures of the first and second coming of Christ!
I am aware that certain denominations scrap Christmas but don't do the feasts. Your husband may have come from one of those? Yep, time for a talk!
I grew up doing Christmas and Easter as an evangelical Christian but gave them up about 6 years ago. It was hard transitioning, but just being honest here, it was very freeing! No judgement for whatever your family decides to do...
 
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