What kind of things do you do to see her smile?

[Hisdaughter]

Polygyny is not for the weak. It's hard, sometimes more then others. I have the idea that if we all get up in the morning thinking, How can I help my sister today? How can I lift her spirits or make her day a little easier or brighter? When we were at the retreat I witnessed a lady get up and put a sweater around her sw. I thought wow that was so sweet. I have never seen one sw do that for another. What a great example to the rest of us. What are some things you do to help your Sw? What do you do to brighten her day a little or relieve some stress for her? What are some ideas to make her day better? All are welcome to respond whether you have a sw or not. If you don't have a sw then what are some examples if things you would live if you had a sw? Bless y'all!

 

[Leslie Pease]

A few different things I do.. One time when she was having a hard day I gave her a note that had all of the reasons why I loved her on it. I give her lots of hugs. Sometimes if shes having a hard day I tell her what I've been struggling with so she feels like shes not alone. Sometimes I give her a hard time to make her laugh. I think I might have a leg up on this because I've known my sister her whole life... But thats some of what I do
Oh, I also have a gift for making really yummy drinks and snacks so I do that for her as well sometimes.

 

[Joleneakamama]

I'm relatively new to this reality at less then three months.

I give my Mr and his new Mrs room to enjoy this stage of their life together. I don't ever want to get into comparing or keeping score...judging each other's contributions.

While a 'job share' always seemed smart to me, it was the opportunity to seriously invest myself in another close and permanent relationship that held by far the most appeal.

I'm sure there are going to be some aspects of this that are hard for her, so I try and do some practical things to make her life easier.
I'm already used to getting up and making breakfast....so I do. I'm already used to doing the laundry...
I hold down the home front so she can run errands with hubby.
I extend my habit of serving my husband to her as well, for example if I bring food, or take a dish to the kitchen.

I hope to communicate that she is loved, welcome in our family and appreciated for who she is.

None of this has been hard, and what is really easy is loving our new family members..

....and looking forward to more!

 

[MeganC]

Sometimes it's not about what we do for our sisters it's what we do to appreciate the things they do for us.

Like being grateful when they take care of your infant so you can sleep.

Accepting a courtesy or a gift graciously and without vexing them with nonsense like, "Oh, you shouldn't have!" or, "I don't deserve this!"

Just being happy about the miracle of someone else wanting to cuddle up with you.

 

[Emily]

I love the idea of this thread!
I don't have a sisterwife and I'm not even married, so I don't know exactly what I would do. However, I do know I would give her lot's of hugs and have a nice chat with her if we are feeling down.

Accepting a courtesy or a gift graciously and without vexing them with nonsense like, "Oh, you shouldn't have!" or, "I don't deserve this!"

Just wondering, is saying "Oh, you shouldn't have!" or, "I don't deserve this!" rude? I don't say those, but I thought they were a humble of saying "thank you". I used to be afraid that people would think I'm prideful if I just said "thank you".

 

[MeganC]

Just wondering, is saying "Oh, you shouldn't have!" or, "I don't deserve this!" rude? I don't say those, but I thought they were a humble of saying "thank you". I used to be afraid that people would think I'm prideful if I just said "thank you".

A very wise person once told me that since God loves a cheerful giver then we are required to be gracious recipients of gifts. We say "Thank you" and we accept the gift.

Saying those other things can be a form of rejection even if we're trying to be polite.

 

[Leslie Pease]

Just wondering, is saying "Oh, you shouldn't have!" or, "I don't deserve this!" rude? I don't say those, but I thought they were a humble of saying "thank you". I used to be afraid that people would think I'm prideful if I just said "thank you".

Saying those other things can be a form of rejection even if we're trying to be polite.

I really think that its the heart behind why you are saying it and certain people will recieve it differently than others so I think its just important to get to know the person you are talking to and respond accordingly. I dont think that you saying those things Emily would be rude at all.

 

[primrose]

If you don't have a sw then what are some examples if things you would live if you had a sw? Bless y'all!

For me, it’s taking the time first to understand what she appreciates or finds comforting because I’d want to uplift her in ways that are meaningful to her specifically. Maybe it’s little notes to brighten her day, maybe it’s helping out to give her a break or like Megan mentioned, cuddling together. I’d think it’d be fun to go out on our own ladies night for dinner or outing to invest in strengthening our own bond. I also think just quiet time- just being together- is easy for me to overlook but it’s those little things day-by-day which help carry me through when it’s rough