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Dating / matchmaking websites

I've shifted the court discussion into its own thread:

Kingdom courts

The whole marriage thing hasn't been good for a very long time. Whether people have the license or not isn't the issue, it's the commitment to the relationship; it's determining to stay together through all the challenges that come along and it's no different for any number of wives a man may...
biblicalfamilies.org biblicalfamilies.org
 
Daniel DeLuca said:
I agree wholeheartedly! I have abandoned my effort to maintain the site ... too much time and effort required. I am willing to consult for anyone who would like to embark on such a venture though.
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I think the best matchmaking service is a church family and large extended family looking out for you and making connections.

But that requires a kind of singlemindedness pushing for traditional marriage that pretty much doesn't exist anymore.
 
rockfox said:
I think the best matchmaking service is a church family and large extended family looking out for you and making connections.
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Preach it brother!

You know as a part of a church, I have to tread carefully. I think they don't worry too much about what I believe as long as I don't try to "lure" a woman "astray" so to speak.
 
Daniel DeLuca said:
Preach it brother!

You know as a part of a church, I have to tread carefully. I think they don't worry too much about what I believe as long as I don't try to "lure" a woman "astray" so to speak.
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I'm mostly not talking about finding a wife for myself. I've already got one. I'm more concerned about my children. Marriage is failing. The church has lost her saltiness. The culture is condemned. The nation is flagging. Things are in a bad way out there.
 
You've identified the problem and a solution. I for one agree heavily that the local assembly of the followers of Jesus/Yeshua ought to see eachother as family, and potential future daughters and sons in law. That requires intentionality.

Here in Lynchburg, there's only two of us who are trying to build more than a once-a-week social book club. But I fully expect that the consistent drive towards an intentional family dynamic will become more and more attractive to those who need family. This involves abandoning many other things, and few are willing to abandon so much. For those who do, the reward is a family that can build and grow. You and I have to be the first ones to step out in intentionality.

Just the other day, I noticed a fella checking out some ladies. So I asked the barrister (coffee shop guys!) the gals names and did a magic trick to introduce the gals and the guy. He clammed up and wouldn't engage them... His loss. The gals weren't my type, but I still went out of my way to try and cause some level of comfortable interaction for others. I was paying attention to their lives, their thoughts and feelings, and seeking their wellbeing. Even with strangers! How much more should we do for our brothers in the Messiah?
 
So, I did a quick google search and got a number of results. "Polygyny Dating Websites" came up with plenty. They are out there.
 
So, I did a quick google search and got a number of results. "Polygyny Dating Websites" came up with plenty. They are out there.
 
paterfamilias said:
They are out there but in large part they are full of bots, scammers and ooooh so many swingers.
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Which isn't any different than the content of the monogamy websites. Different numbers involved, same fundamental problem.
 
The large sun-god-day megachurch won't work for some of us. ;)
(For a whole buncha reasons...)

And you are both right about so many of the websites -
paterfamilias said:
They are out there but in large part they are full of bots, scammers and ooooh so many swingers.
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rockfox said:
Which isn't any different than the content of the monogamy websites. Different numbers involved, same fundamental problem.
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But for those of us who have ALREADY done what I've been teaching for years -
"Come out of her, My people," -
the options that don't rely strictly on His intervention are more limited.
 
My family has an advisor, she called today for another matter. But we got to talking because she was trying figure out why I was acting in such unusual ways. So we got to talking about how I don't go to church, but I do hang out with one other guy to do Bible study. She had never heard of someone who accepts Jesus, AND the Torah. So she was asking how she thought I would find a wife who would follow such a fringe belief. I said, well, odds are I won't find such a woman by normal means. It is far far more likely I'll find a man who believes as I do, who also happens to have a daughter. Alternatively, I'm just so dang charming with my abrasive declarations of truth in public, that a nearby lady wants to learn more. I mean, I've had meals paid for by other patrons while arguing in defense of Paul's keeping the Law in a restaraunt, and that's not too dissimilar to getting a wife because she likes what she hears, right? :-P
 
DawoodSaar said:
My family has an advisor, she called today for another matter. But we got to talking because she was trying figure out why I was acting in such unusual ways. So we got to talking about how I don't go to church, but I do hang out with one other guy to do Bible study. She had never heard of someone who accepts Jesus, AND the Torah. So she was asking how she thought I would find a wife who would follow such a fringe belief. I said, well, odds are I won't find such a woman by normal means. It is far far more likely I'll find a man who believes as I do, who also happens to have a daughter. Alternatively, I'm just so dang charming with my abrasive declarations of truth in public, that a nearby lady wants to learn more. I mean, I've had meals paid for by other patrons while arguing in defense of Paul's keeping the Law in a restaraunt, and that's not too dissimilar to getting a wife because she likes what she hears, right? :p
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Were those patrons free ladies?

Maybe you already missed future Miss DawoodSaar. Don't make same mistake twice. 😉
 
MemeFan said:
Were those patrons free ladies?

Maybe you already missed future Miss DawoodSaar. Don't make same mistake twice. 😉
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Judging from the conversation they had about how much they hated past boyfriends and the low quality of men in their life on average, I learned I was not their type either. I'm utterly drowning in college women who are all rah rah about egalitarianism and equality under women. So... Yeah. They were physically attractive, but still not my type.
 
rockfox said:
I'm mostly not talking about finding a wife for myself. I've already got one. I'm more concerned about my children. Marriage is failing. The church has lost her saltiness. The culture is condemned. The nation is flagging. Things are in a bad way out there.
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I thought the gist of this thread was matchmaking sites for the purpose of finding a second wife.
 
Daniel DeLuca said:
I thought the gist of this thread was matchmaking sites for the purpose of finding a second wife.
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You ever known a thread around here to stay on track? *checks page count*

Seriously though, my point was that the problem we face is ultimately the same which faces finding a first wife. Fix one you fix the other. And if your church isn't helping you bear your burdens then they're not really acting like a church now are they?

Besides, I already have children; them finding mates is more important to me than me finding a second wife.
 
One of my biggest complaints in the many churches I've been a part of was that they not only didn't care to help me find a spouse; they actively inhibited any possibility. The culture is so actively anti-male in American churches that I had to leave just to breath that sweet fresh testosterone in the morning. I'm really glad to be among hairy-chested men for once. And I was in the military, and even with all the rah rah, they were effeminates, and sodomites, and betas galore.

This website COULD fill that niche of an assembly of many roughly-like-minded-people who could also be looking out for eachother... But I understand certain web safety laws prevent such a thing. And so the giant banner at the top saying dating here is verbotten. But that doesn't stop the parents of young ladies exploring the options via the conversations or chat functions. ;-)

Again, Rockfox, I see you have identified the problem and a solution... Make it happen man!

*You wouldn't happen to be the same guy as The Barking Fox website right?
 
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