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Dating / matchmaking websites

MeganC said:
Wow! I listened to the video and loved one of her words about 'situationships' and that is so true! That's what so many of my old friends have!

She also makes what for me was a compelling reason to consider poly. She's right that men are not like women and if you want a man who's like a woman then that's not a man. But she does correct this and say marry a man and get your girly relationship somewhere else. Why not have that relationship with a sisterwife? But then let your man be a man and don't be upset with him when he's manly (says the hypocrite who's fighting with her husband right now!)
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You're grieving. Let it happen.
 
FollowingHim2 said:
I love this! It's more like "Here's where we can team up for God" rather than "Here's some random things I like to do in my spare time".
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Absolutely, I hate that sites have to veil details and such because of generalization for the majority. I've been on the big two sites for almost two years and I wish I could have a firm space of "this is what I like and what I am looking for" without filling a novel in a small space. Also, so so many people don't read bios.
 
On a different note, I spent the majority of my free time today working on entering my hundreds of passwords into a password manager called Bitwarden.

That is irrelevant to this discussion; it's just how I ended up discovering that I hadn't followed through on setting up a profile years ago on something called Zoosk. As I've explained before, I spent many years on a few non-dedicated-to-polygamy dating sites, made many friends, pursued some potential matches, but ultimately dropped off altogether a couple years ago. On a lark, I signed up on Zoosk, because it says it's for single men and women, and, hey, I'm looking for the latter. I provided a photo, filled out my demographic data, wrote what kind of woman I'm seeking, and wrote my 'Story,' keeping it plain and simple to that I'm already in a permanent, committed relationship but am looking for another woman who will join us in a plural family. It got spitted out, and I was told to write something different that didn't include any of the following three things: name, telephone number or sexually-explicit language (none of which I'd included). So I just rewrote it leaving out the phrase 'plural family' and added a paragraph about how some women recognize and are grateful enough for the fact that men "organize and provide the vast majority of the structure, protection, guidance and sacrifice that keeps the world they depend on in working order" that they want to be helpmeets (not using that word).

And it was approved! Of course, probably by a computer, but now I'm taking bets on how long it will be before I get the Big Shoe . . .

The full text:

"Have already lived at least 10 of my 9 lives, so I'm living on borrowed time and am grateful every day for the next 35 years I believe God has in store for me. I am currently in a permanent, committed relationship and plan to stay that way. I'm looking for another woman who is seeking a permanent, committed relationship with a good, Christian man who lives life according to Biblical principles.

"Some women recognize that men organize and provide the vast majority of the structure, protection, guidance and sacrifice that keeps the world they depend on in working order -- and want to express their gratitude by doing anything they can to help their man, knowing he will always be there. I'm looking for that kind of woman."
 
Maybe the computer thought "plural" was your "name".
 
Philip said:
Maybe the computer thought "plural" was your "name".
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MayBE!

But I just expanded my description this evening, and everything was approved.

I think this is likely to be a complete waste of time, but at least I'll have something to report. And at least it won't be the freak show that OK Cupid was.
 
USDutchkitty said:
Have the social skills of a 10-year-old playing Fortnite.
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Are those the nights that they put the blankets over the chairs and won’t let the girls in?

;)o_O
 
steve said:
Are those the nights that they put the blankets over the chairs and won’t let the girls in?

;)o_O
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Chairs? I used the sofa, dining chairs, recliner, and sofa cushions as reinforcements! It wasn't a fort... It was a castle! Thought it would keep my brother and my Dad out.
 
Philip said:
Looks like someone barely started it and didn't finish it?
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You're quite right; it was started by one of our members, who has gone AWOL in recent months, and I miss him. I fear he was targeted by one of the bloodsucking soulless cowards who occasionally troll around here in attempts to draw people into traps related to polygamy.
 
Patricia C said:
I have been on sisterwives.com and polygamy.com both I was approached by more Muslem men than Christian. A lot of non Christian couples that did not share my faith. And some men who were looking for a partner for their wives. Personally, I think it is a waste of time and energy. I am done looking, Yahweh may or may not bring me someone I'm ok with that.
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Agreed. My wife and I have been members on both mentioned sites. Seems to be a waste. Our experiences is they either were looking for a fling, a meal ticket, or beliefs were not compatible. Mostly the latter. As you we will wait on Him. We truly are looking to grow and add to the Love.
 
Yeah, I don't think it's going anywhere. It was a labour of love by one individual, he has possibly lost interest, as nothing has changed on it for a very long time. Maybe he'll do something with it one day but I wouldn't hold your breath.
 
Keith Martin said:
Yeah, I was going to ask, @Daniel DeLuca, how you are even going to be able to come close to being able to control other human beings to the point of being able to prevent break-ups, malevolent or otherwise. I suppose if you had some kind of private investigation firm employed to check up on people, you might be able to discover the truth about why things went south, but, even then, I don't see that you would have any option beyond banning such individuals from further searching.

I know you want to establish a high level of integrity, purity and righteousness on your site, but you run two risks with that: (a) you are already talking about a relatively small subset of the human population who would even begin to be interested in joining up, but you are limiting that further by strict standards about divorce, etc., and it becoming known that you're policing how things turn out among participants to the point that you are seen as a Controller would likely lead to an even-more-diminished number of people being willing to sign up; and (b) while you laudably desire to create a welcoming, safe environment in which potential inexperienced young women would feel comfortable participating, any degree of cracking down on the men for not following through in manners you deem inappropriate will also increase the attractiveness of the site for the kind of manipulative, nefarious scammers we regularly experience here on Biblical Families. Just imagine the following scenario: young woman from a family of grifters pretends to be a virginal 18-year-old who is dedicated to becoming the next wife in an already-established family and presents herself as being set on marrying a man at least twice her age. Once she has one or more such men on the hook thinking that they may have found their pot of gold, all she has to do is start threatening that she will report each of those men (all of whom think that they're the sole target) to your website with the obvious threat being that they will get kicked off and lose their opportunity to seek another wife, hinting also that she may use whatever personally-identifiable information the men have inevitably provided her to create other mayhem in their lives, implying all along that what they really need is some cash to correct the unfair financial dilemmas she and her family face in their lives as highly-righteous Christians who have been discriminated against.

There are good legal and practical reasons why website providers do their best to distance themselves from having any influence on the actual behavior of their website participants. OK Cupid led the way on creating the whole 17+ gender designations, which led to a flood of transgenders, and when OK Cupid began pushing loyalty (to transgenderism, etc.) oaths on its members, membership plummeted, and the only reason the platform still exists is that it was bought by the owners of Match.com (or its main rival, I can't remember which) and will incrementally be watered down. Before they started the loyalty oaths, OK Cupid was the third-tier powerhouse of dating sites; now it's a joke populated predominantly by transgenders, frauds and women who have no idea how out of line with reality their opinions of themselves are. I don't think you want to follow their example.

P.S. I know you said no touchdowns, but did you get to see any tornado formations? I would never want anyone or their home to receive a direct hit from one, but I've seen a lot of tornadoes and tornado formations in my life, and I find them fascinating to the point of continuing to be very thankful that I've had the close encounters (and even one very direct hit) I've experienced. They are, among other things, a tremendous demonstration of the physical capabilities of our God.
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Pof has declined even further- hard to believe. There's many trans people posing as women, they can't be removed or weeded out of searches, they're just labelled 'women'.
 
MeganC said:
Dating sites are freakshows. At least from what I saw.
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I am really not liking this putting the toe back in the water. The more I read about other people's experiences. the websites and my own negative memories from the last time I was out there the more I dread it.
Only on Sisterwives so far. I am talking to a woman now and she is very nice so far...fingers crossed...I met a couple or three women who did the equivalent of dine and dash. I am probably boring or was supposed to move faster in some respect or something. Dunno.
 
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